Buzz. Zeitgeist. Electrifying! Lists. Lists of lists. Lists of the greatest lists of lists. Lists of the most powerful lists of the greatest lists of lists. Lists of the lists that shook the lists that shaped the lists that changed the world forever. I should make a list of these lists. Or someone should make it for me. I wonder if I could get an OmniList iPhone app for my... MORE >
"Did she see you had an entourage with you?" asked Bobby. "Yes, she definitely noticed," The Observer replied. The Observer had just had a close call on the floor of the Armory Show. Looking at two large photographs by Candida Hofer, he had been accosted by an ex-girlfriend. "Hey," The Observer had whispered. "It's good to see you, but I can't talk. These people with me don't know who I really am." The ex-girlfriend fled the scene, and... MORE >
After 20 years and 30 issues, Open City is ceasing publication, co-editor Joanna Yas told The Observer. "These things are not institutions," said founder and co-editor Thomas Beller. "They're always razor's edge things." Ms. Yas and Mr. Beller decided to shut down the journal after multiple sources of funding pulled out. They hadn't expected issue 30 to be the swansong. "The vibe of the last party," said Mr. Beller, "showed me that the magazine has had a... MORE >
Let's say I have $60 billion in assets, not frozen but liquid. And let's say that after 42 years of glorious rule and personal enrichment, and a few weeks of pointless, no doubt Western-inspired bloodshed, I decide enough is enough. What if I moved to New York? What could that $60 billion buy... MORE >
"When I bring a guy home, he has to measure up to Kai Ryssdal," said the brunette. "The only guy close on NPR is Jad from Radiolab." "When Kai Ryssdal talks about money--oh, Jesus!" said the blonde, of the host of Marketplace. She mimed a swoon. "Kai's gotten me through a lot," said the brunette. "I work in the fashion industry, I spend all day with women, and at 6:30 when I get home, I need... MORE >
Postmodernity has culminated in my torn underwear. The fragmentation of my fishnets signals the teetering of a mode of authority that was in the end so much bad romance. In the depthlessness of my stare heralds equality in superficiality, and digitality allows my hair to be everywhere. The utopian gesture has in my heels undergone a fundamental mutation. We are a convergence of meat freaks. What has capitalism done for us... MORE >
Who am "I"? And why do "I" have to be one person? Is it just because the letter "I" looks like the number "1"? Too many people are devoted to their own singularity. "I" am not a monad. Or should "I" say, "I" are not a monad. Or should "I" say, "I" are "we" are "James Franco." The principle components of "James Franco"... MORE >
I come from Greece, the land of Zeus. What sprang full-born from my skull has now fetched $315 million. Now, like the Queens of Minos, I will rule an empire, an empire of content. The Internet is a labyrinth. Teeming and toiling within the endless maze are journalists, citizens, citizen-journalists and unique visitors. It doesn't take a Midas to monetize them. My feeling is that a service provider whose profits have been diminishing since... MORE >
I have sat here in the desert for more than 4,000 years. I watched as Pharaoh Ahmose I expelled the dreaded Hyksos from the Nile. I saw the missionaries of Hatshetsup deliver her myrrh trees from the Land of Punt. Thutmose III forged his empire from the banks of the Euphrates to the fourth Nile waterfall in Nubia. Akhenaten married Nefertiti and smashed the gods of Egypt in favor of Aten, the sun disc.... MORE >
I'm considering another run for president and weighing the pros and the cons. On the pro side, there's power, fame, the chance to secure my legacy in history and thus ensure that I am remembered in the national consciousness for something more than a few cameo appearances on Seinfeld, as well as the chance to constantly mention my leadership role on a certain day almost 10-excuse me!... MORE >
I'm working on my personal brand. I don't want to be just a football player, a dumb jock who just throws balls in the air further and faster and more accurately than a few other guys (guys like Tom Brady). I want to be a whole human being. I want to have feelings, feelings that don't just have to do with beating the Patriots or the Steelers or Ben Roethlisberger or Tom Brady. I... MORE >
We will bury you. You will be helpless in our frigid embrace. We will stop your trains, halt your cars, stall your trucks and cripple your buses. We will put your city into a coma. All of your money is useless against us. Your billionaire mayor is but an impotent elf. We will close your schools, and your children will learn nothing. We will starve you, chill you, bite you. Ponder the word amputation.... MORE >
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The Observer was sitting at his desk on Saturday afternoon. He clicked the tab for Twitter on his Web browser. Five Tweets down on his Timeline he saw a Tweet by @Beach_Sloth that read, http://thoughtcatalog.com/2011/tao-lin-and-megan-boyle-of-mdma-films-are-married/ @xsssy @heusar @tao_lin @meganboyle Congrats newly... MORE >
Of all the indignities I have suffered, the fiasco of incompetence that has resulted from my decision to sign my life rights over to Broadway producers is no doubt the most gratuitous, not to mention the corniest. And beyond the accidents, the orchestra pit tumbles, the broken ribs and the cracked vertebrae—all slurs upon my legendary reflexes and agility—there is the matter of the measly sum I received for the option to turn my... MORE >
While confined here in Ellingham Hall, I came across recent statements calling my present activities "unwise and untimely," plus "unscrupulous," "thuggish," "criminal" and "megalomaniacal." Seldom do I pause to answer criticism of my work and ideas. If I sought to answer all the criticisms that enter my in-box, I would have to undertake a volume of correspondence dwarfing that of the entire United States government, and I would have no time to leak the... MORE >
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